Countdown to Africa: 1 Week!

I am less than one week away from boarding a plane headed to Africa. While the pile of donations and personal things to pack that have taken over our bedroom, the anti malaria pill I just took, and the constant "Are you ready yet??" questions are a continual reminder of how close it is getting....at times I still can't believe I'm going. I'm so ready though. I know God is going to do big things through our team and in my heart. I felt that before this week, but that belief has been bolstered the last few days.

I firmly believe Satan knows what is coming in my life and is trying to derail my positive, excited attitude and my growing relationship/dependence on my Lord and Savior. Tuesday evening I was great! Ended the day with a great Bible study with some girlfriends. Woke up Wed. to some unexpected news that affects us financially. Instead of working my brain about how I could "fix" it, I prayed and read the Bible. And cried to him, because he knew it was coming long before I and he will provide. He always does!

I also woke up with a swollen, itchy pinky finger. Weird, right? I had pulled weeds(sans gloves) Tuesday night, so the only thing I can think of is I got into something or bit by something. I felt a little itchy all day, then around 7 last night I literally broke out in hives all over my body. So strange, I don't have any allergies so this was my first experience like that. I took some benadryl and got relief from the itching over night. My rash is a little better today, but still a bit uncomfortable.

As I was thinking over these things I realized Satan is trying to steal my joy and peace over this trip. He wants me uncomfortable and worried. Too bad. My God has gone before me, and I know the outcome. He wins the ultimate battle. I may still have a rash when I get on the plane next week but my focus will not be deterred from my purpose.

So who knows what else may happen before I leave! I pray everything goes smoothly of course, but again, it is in God's hands so therefore I have nothing to worry about :) To God be the glory when his perfect will comes to fruition!

Thankful Tuesday

Back again for Thankful Tuesday! This week I am thankful Nick and I have parents who love being grandparents and are so involved in our sons lives. I am also thankful we live close to both sides of our families. In the future we may move for Nick's job, there is no way of knowing right now. So I am going to be very thankful for the present and all the time we have with them close right now :)

I am thankful for the women's Bible study I am doing with some friends from church this summer!

Thankful to have found a great hair stylist, ha! I had my appointment this evening, and it is so great to just relax and feel a little pampered every 6 weeks - am I right?? :)

Finally I'm thankful for HGTV this week, haha. We are getting ready to re-paint some rooms and I love getting inspired while watching because the professionals are obviously much better at those decisions than me! :)

Once again, I'm still here!

Well I am back. Hopefully this time a little more regularly, but no promises considering my recent track record! It seems this summer I have fallen into a routine where I just haven't been on the computer as much, and while there are things I miss about reading blogs, pinterest, and all the rest the internet has to offer when I'm not on for a while....its also nice to take a break from being so "plugged in". It also didn't help the situation when Nick's foot and our laptop had an unfortunate meeting by accident and it is currently out of comission :) so this evening I decided to download the blogger app for my phone and try it out.

My trip is fast approaching. I decided to go last fall, and I must say it is pretty cool all that I have already learned and experienced - and I haven't even left yet. I am starting to get everything around to pack up in these next few weeks. The first trip of the summer for Ordinary Hero is currently in Ethiopia, and it is so thrilling to read the blog and follow their trip and know in a few short weeks I will be experiencing it all first hand!

To follow up on my last post, I did get my tattoo! The pain was nowhere near what I was worried it would be. If you have been in labor, you could handle a tattoo :) I am so pleased with the final result. It means a lot to me. I will do another post on that once I figure out how to add pictures with this app, ha!

Carsten has been enjoying his first season of tball, and we have just 2 games left. We are having a laid back summer and lots of fun, but he does keep asking when school starts again(I'm anxious to see how many years that question will last!).

Royce is so precious. Just the most laid back, relaxed, content, happy baby :) so content in fact that at 10 months we do not have a crawler quite yet, more of a roller :) and not all table food yet, because this little boy just doesn't care to chew quite yet either! I have a feeling all those changes will come at once and soon though. Almost a year old, I can't believe it!

I think I will finish this up for tonight because doing this on my phone I feel like I just typed the worlds longest text message, ha!

Alive and Well

For the few who read this blog and may be wondering...yes I'm still here and no I haven't given up on or forgotten this blog! I just took a little bit of an unplanned "get away" from the blog world for a bit....both reading all my fave blogs and writing on my own. But I'm back and feeling ready to go!

My mission trip is now a little more than a month away! So many emotions as I get ready to leave. But mostly excitement. Excitement for many things - especially what God is going do to me through this experience! I was talking with a friend recently about how we take mission trips to help others, but there is a "good selfishness" (if that makes sense) aspect to mission trips because you know you will gain so much from the trip as well and not just those you are going to serve. Some people argue - Why fundraise and spend thousands of dollars to go there when you could simply give that money to a charity? Well, there are times when giving may be better served, but Jesus also said to go into all the world and show his love, make disciples. Sometimes the giving of a dollar can do that, and sometimes its the human interaction. Also, there is no denying when you feel God's calling on your heart to do something.

I did my first 5k! I did have to walk some - but come on, for this absolute non-runner to decide 7 weeks out that she would attempt a 5k was quite a fete itself! And I finished running. So I am proud I even tried. It fit in with my "just go for it" motto of 2012 :) And I am signed up for another one in July so I guess the craziness will continue....

Tomorrow I am getting my tattoo. I talked about this in a previous post, and the time has come :) It is a very emotional thing for me. It will be pretty simple looking, but there is a lot of meaning going into it. I  have had a working idea of it in my mind for around four years now. Look for pictures and the meaning explained in an upcoming post :)

I just love my church. It is the most "real" group of people I have been associated with. That is not saying I have not been a part of good churches in the past. A lot of it has to do with my own personal growth and my first time as an adult truly being part of a church. But I so, so, so encourage anyone who is reading this to find the same church for themselves. One where you can go when things are great and when things are so messed up and there is love with no judgment either way. Every church should ideally be this way. But I guess what I'm saying is - Don't give up on finding a church that feels like home if you haven't yet. And if you want to come to one in Fort Wayne - May I suggest Christ's Church @ Georgetown :)

I will end with some precious pics of my boys. Life is good!

My sweet blessings

1st Year of T-ball! Go #14!

 Future bookworm like his Mama?

Last day of preschool :) (Don't worry, he has since gotten a haircut, ha!)



Thankful Tuesday

Well after missing last week - for no good reason, really - I am back for Thankful Tuesday :)

I am thankful for my husband. I know no matter what that man will never leave my side. He makes sure I know how much he loves me. So grateful for the man God gave me to spend my life with.

I'm thankful for the sweet sounds I hear coming from Carsten's bedroom down the hall. We put him to bed but he is currently in a conversation with his stuffed animals.

Thankful for God's timing in all aspects of my life. It's funny how I can look back and see his hand at work, yet sometimes its hard to remember that while thinking of the future. Anyone else deal with that? You know, the whole being human thing?

My mission trip is officially PAID for! Anything more that is donated will go towards donations I will be taking. SO thankful for that!!

What are you thankful for this week?

And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Colossians 3:17



Mom to Boys

If you are visiting from Kelly's Korner, welcome! I am linking up to today's post for Moms of all boys.

In 2008 we were blessed with Carsten....

Then in 2011 little Royce came along...

I am blessed to be able to stay home with these two, and I thank God for that everyday. I am what you would call a "girly girl", so playing trucks and building castles and forts and helping dress a little superhero in his costume isn't something that I would guess would come naturally to me. But I do it, and I enjoy it! I take great pride in raising these little boys to be men of God.

I am fairly new to blogging, but much of what I have written about so far has to do with parenting these two. So if you feel you can relate - please hang out and introduce yourselves! I have already seen what a great community the blogging world can be and I'm excited to make some friendships!





Thankful Tuesday

It is Thankful Tuesday again, a weekly roundup of a few things my heart is feeling thankful for!

This little cutie is 8 months old today.

This last month was pretty big - his first few teeth and sitting up all on his own!

Thankfully, teething hasn't been too hard on him.

Thankful for this reminder in my Jesus Calling devotion today:

"Things that are visible are brief and fleeting, while things that are invisible are everlasting."

Feeling overwhelming gratefulness for all who have contributed to my trip to Ethiopia.

I'm thankful I completed the first week of my couch to 5k app and am still alive to type about it.

That's a big deal when you have never, ever liked to run.

Really - that's possibly the most I've ran since junior high track.

It's just not my thing.

:)

But - a friend asked me to do a 5k with her, and to keep myself accountable,

I said yes.

I am thankful for accountability.

Because between you and me, there ain't no other way I would be running a 5k!

Finally, I am thankful that on this upcoming weekend we celebrate the death and resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Without him, without his death, without his resurrection,

I would not have the life I have.

His mercies are new everyday.

And for that, I am thankful.

Memories.

Do you know how a particular smell can take you right back to a certain place and time? Today Carsten asked for strawberry milk...

(Well he actually always calls it raspberry milk for some reason. I say "Don't you mean strawberry?" and he laughs and says "Ya, the pink milk!") :)

So I poured the milk and opened the mix. I got a little whiff of that pink powder and was transported back in time to my Grandma and Grandpa's kitchen when I was a little girl, not much older than Carsten, staying on night with my brothers.

Please know my Grandma is the best cook I know. There are many food smells that take my mind straight to her and most of them are homemade, with love being the main ingredient. But just a tiny little bit of that Nesquik and my mind was right back there, looking up at her as she stirred my milk from white to pink. Carsten quickly grabbed the cup from my hand and was off to play, but for a few moments part of me was still there...in my Grandma's kitchen with no cares in the world.

It's not always a smell. Sometimes its a song. Or being at a particular place. Something that unleashes the flood of memories in your mind and no matter how long its been you are right there again, experiencing those emotions anew. It can be positive things, but also hurtful. I have so many different ones that I can pinpoint throughout my childhood. After stirring that milk this morning it got me thinking, what will my children's be? What things will take them right back to their childhood? And will the good outweigh the bad?

Sometimes I get a little overwhelmed when I really sit and think about the magnitude of responsibility it is to raise a little person from birth til they are out on their own. There are so many books, styles of parenting, classes, etc. that tell you the perfect way to raise children. What you should and should not do to ensure that they turn out "normal" and won't hate you forever once they become a teenager. Yikes. For me it is a battle between being the relaxed parent, yet enforcing guidelines, to the perfectionist wanting to give them every experience possible. And I'm only four years in!

I can't live my life trying to ensure that every memory my child has of their childhood will be picturesque and perfect. That will just stress me out. At the end of the day I can't dwell on the fact that I lost my patience at one point and forget about the sweet moments I did have. I can only give it all to God - including my children - and do my best with His divine help. They are His before they are mine. And they are only "mine" for such a short time, really. So yes, while once in a while I worry if my sons will always think I'm the greatest mom - I don't ever allow myself to spend too much time on that thought. Because I know the enemy feeds on my insecurities and I can't allow him even a bit of a foothold there. I have a job to do. It pays in slobbery kisses, temper tantrums, long days, late nights, sweet smiles, dirty diapers, piles of laundry, precious I love yous, laughter, hugs, and so many memories.

One day in the future Carsten may be stirring a glass of strawberry milk for his son or his daughter. They will be off to play and he will be standing in his kitchen, looking out the window and back in time with a memory of his Mama playing in his mind that feels so real its almost like he could reach out and touch me at twenty-five with his four year old hand.

Oh how I pray the memory is sweet...as sweet as raspberry strawberry pink milk.

Thankful Tuesday

Today I am starting something new, a weekly post called "Thankful Tuesday". This idea comes from one of the blogs I read, The Fisher Family. Ashley, the author, inspires me so with her clear desire to continually learn more about God and draw closer to him. I really liked the idea of making it a point to identify some things you are thankful for that week. How often do we really think of those things? We can get caught up in our lives so quickly that we forget all we have to truly to be thankful for. So I'm excited for the first Thankful Tuesday over here in my corner of blog land :)

I'm thankful to wake up to these 2 cuties calling me Mama.

(Well, Carsten says that...Royce currently just squeals and smiles when I get him out of the crib.)

I am thankful for my health,

for time with family this past weekend,

that we found such an awesome church. Seriously, so, so thankful.

I am thankful for my new phone.

I upgraded.

The apps have been great, and yes I know I'm late to this party.

A Bible app for a daily devotion sent straight to my phone.

Fitness app to keep track of calories/Couch to 5K running app.

The Kindle app saved me when I finished The Hunger Games and was in place 76 on the wait list for Catching Fire at my library, and I just could. not. wait. :)

I'm thankful for a little date with my hubby.

Firehouse Subs and The Hunger Games movie.

I read it(see above). He had not(I know, so sad).

We both enjoyed it :)

I'm thankful for my dear Grandma.

She is such an inspiration to me in so many ways.

This weekend she gave me the devotional Jesus Calling.

It is so special knowing it came from her.

Just a few things, some deep, some not so deep, that I am taking a moment to say thank you for.

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever.

Psalm 136:1



A Chance to Help

One of the many benefits of having a blog is being able to share things with others that I believe in.
Tom Davis is the author of Red Letters: Living a Faith That Bleeds, which is an amazing book that was a huge part in spurring me towards going on my mission trip (Read it!! Please!). He is the founder of Children's Hopechest, whose mission is "that every orphan has the right to know God, experience the blessing of family, and have the opportunity to develop independent living skills." I think that's a mission we can all get behind, right?

Right now Children's Hopechest is selling t-shirts to support orphans in Haiti and victims of sex slave trading in Moldova. Hopefully you know there are over 147 million orphans in the world, but do you know how prevalent sex slavery is in our world? It is devastating. And it happens on the other side of the world and also right here in the United States. And often to such young girls. My heart breaks. But I can do something, and so can you.

Each time one of these shirts from Children's Hopechest are purchased you are helping to make a difference. I have found when I've bought shirts for similar causes in the past, they always start conversations when I wear them. Which is another awesome way to help spread awareness. An added bonus when you purchase a shirt? You are entered for a free mission trip through Children's Hopechest! Please read the following from Tom Davis, and consider helping make a difference!


27 million. That’s the estimated number of modern day slaves. Including all forms of slavery such as child labor, forced prostitution, domestic servitude, debt bondage, etc. 27 million. For comparison, 27 million people is triple the population of New York City. 27 million is the combined population of Florida and Georgia.

Imagine every man woman and child in Atlanta, Miami, Orlando and everywhere in between being forced into slavery.

Now here’s an easier number to grasp. Eight. That’s not hard for me. I have 9 people in my family. I have friends with more. Eight people is four couples on a date. Eight is a youth basketball team. Eight is a small number. Nearly insignificant.

Today we need to care about the eight. Right now in Moldova there are 8 women living in the Beginning of Life rehabilitation center for the survivors of human trafficking. Just eight women live there, trying to rebuild the most delicate and complex parts of their lives.

Each has a different story played in the same key. Tricked, trafficked, and trashed.

Their bodies were used for profit. They were created in the image of God, and through the work of evil people they were systematically abused in the most profound ways. But their story didn’t end there…

Today you can care for these eight women. Right now they are going about their daily routine at the Beginning of Life home, working with counselors and therapists to journey toward healing and wholeness.
You can help.

[Click here to buy a Shirt]

It may seem like buying a shirt is no big deal.
Here’s why I think it is:

1. It provides financial support. Your purchase provides funding for these 8 women, and the next 8, and the 8 after them. Rehabilitation is long-term, and expensive.

2. It will start conversations. When asked about it, you can share the story of the Beginning of Life home in Moldova, and bring even more people to the cause.

3. It’s a starting point. Get more involved in justice and trafficking issues this year. There’s lots more you can do to fight slavery, this one just happens to be buying a shirt.

We all start somewhere, usually at the “beginning.” That’s one reason why I love the name of our partner ministry in Moldova, “Beginning of Life.” For these women, it is a new beginning. One you can be part of and support today.

[Click here to buy a shirt to help support these women's rehabilitation from sex trafficking.]

Don't have the money to buy a shirt right now? You can still make a difference by praying for those who are being affected by the sex slave industry right now and all those without a family to call their own. Thank you!

Following a Calling

I enjoy looking back in my life and seeing God's hands at work. It is no question that the blogs I read have helped change my life and God knew that this would happen all along. Around 3 years ago I stumbled upon a video. I can't tell you how exactly, I forget those details. But I don't forget how I felt after I watched it.

via youtube

Along with the video there was a link to the family's blog. I began to read along on their journey. The author talked about the organization Ordinary Hero, which her sister had began. I clicked over to their blog one day and little did I know at the time, but in a few short years I would be preparing to go to Ethiopia as well!

Between finding Ordinary Hero and deciding to go on a mission trip with them, God has led me to many other blogs that deal with international adoption. I don't know yet if that will be a part of our family's story. Let's just say God and I are having many conversations about it and Nick and I are having a few now and then :)

However reading along on these families journeys to bring their children home, all while keeping up with what Ordinary Hero does for "the least of these" was very inspiring, and was really working on my heart. What was I doing to help others? Did I feel that special, like I could really do anything that would make a big difference? No, not really. But wasn't that the whole point of the name Ordinary Hero? Yes, I am a normal wife and mom living the day-to-day routine.....but that doesn't mean God can't use me. He can use me here in the middle of that routine, and he can also use me in Ethiopia if I give a week of my life dedicated to being his hands and feet where I feel called. And as time went on it was becoming very clear to me I was being called to Ethiopia.

Combine all of this with the fact that during this time period we also became regular attenders, then members of a wonderful church after moving to a new city. We met great people, and became involved. My faith was growing like never before and I was back to reading and studying God's word. I had graduated college and was finally settling in to being a stay-at-home Mom that didn't feel like I had to split my time up between my "school life" in one city and my family life in another. We became pregnant and had Royce. It has been such a life changing time.

So when I received an email newsletter from Ordinary Hero containing their 2012 trip dates last fall, my interest was piqued. What if I just went for it? I knew in my heart God was telling me to go for it. Around that time I read this post. And my decision was made. I had seen enough pictures...read enough posts...it was time to go.

On July 5th I will board a plane headed for Addis Ababa, Ethiopia and I can't wait! I will be putting together "blessing bags" as they mentioned in the Ordinary Hero blog post I linked to above. They contain an outfit with socks and underwear and a treat for a child. If you would like to be  a part of that, let me know! I want to take as many donations as possible for the little ones. If you would like to visit my trip fundraising page it can be found here.



Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

James 1:27 NIV

Prayers for My Babies

I am a night owl. Most nights I am always the last one to fall asleep in our home. One of my favorite things to do before turning in for the night is to go in and check on my sleeping boys. I cover them back up if they have kicked off their blankets, kiss their foreheads, say a prayer for them....and sometimes I just stand there with tears in my eyes and a smile on my face at one of the most beautiful sights - a peacefully sleeping child. I don't ever want to forget the thoughts that go through my mind as I stare down at them, so I am recording them here.

My sweet baby boys....I don't think you can ever know how much I love you. My heart actually physically hurts with love for you. Someday you may understand when you become a parent yourself. But for now you are so innocent. I look at your chests slowly rising and falling in your sleep and think about the miracle of life. How the intricacies of the human body all work together so that we may live. I never paid much thought to that before you each grew inside of me and I experienced the miracle of human life and birth. When I stare at the two of you and remember feeling those precious first movements inside of me, I don't understand how anyone could ever question the existence of God.

Sometimes its hard for me to ever imagine either of you grown up, because that would make me....well, older. But it will obviously happen. Someday I will be tucking in tall teenage boys(and hopefully it doesn't freak you out if you wake up and happen to see me standing there crying). When I think of you each getting older I think about how you will be hurt at times. You will face challenges. I will want to run out into the big bad world and protect you from everything but I know I can't do that. Some things we have to experience and learn from on our own. Sweeties, I hope you always know you can come to me no matter what is going on in your life.

But I don't want to get ahead of myself with worry. I want to enjoy each stage. As we walk though life what seems mundane in the present becomes treasured in the past. Our day to day life while you are each young and I am privileged enough to be home with you is so special to me. That chunk of dry wall you took out of the wall the other day Carsten - don't worry about it baby boy because a house isn't a home until its been lived in. And real life with a little boy sometimes involves flying toys. Or sometimes its silly putty being mushed onto Mommy's favorite blanket. Or changing your outfit 34 times in a day because God blessed us with a very spit-up prone baby. Its okay Roycey. I'll change your clothes and do as much laundry as it takes. I just thank God you are healthy and that is the worst of your problems.

I pray about your spiritual life and how God will use your lives if you allow him to. Daddy and I will do our best to raise you, but at some point you will have to choose for yourself what path you will take and what you believe. There may be seasons of your life where you aren't close to God. I hope and pray it doesn't happen because Mommy and Daddy each had those seasons and we have come to realize it is always better to walk with Him. I pray for who will be a part of your life as you grow in school and other activities. I pray for your future relationships and the women you will marry.

And some nights I just pray you have sweet dreams. I watch you smile in your sleep. You each may be a mini-me of your father, but when you smile I can see myself in both of your eyes and the way they get very small. As the saying goes you are each a part of my heart walking around outside of my body. There will be no changing that no matter what age you are.

So I cover you...
I lay my hand on your chest...
I feel you breathe..
I wipe away my tears...
And kiss my precious babies goodnight.



Flu Bug Be Gone

Well friends I was visited by a lovely little bug most people take shots each year to avoid. Yes I woke up early Friday morning with the flu bug. I have to give a public shout-out to my hubby, Nick, for leaving work early Friday and taking care of his sick wife and two little boys all weekend! Luckily the worst of my symptoms were over in about 48 hours but my energy level is still kaput. Although this afternoon I just couldn't take it anymore and did some cleaning. And then I collapsed back into bed with some thin mints and milk that the aforementioned good husband came home from the store with :) Gotta love a man who brings you chocolate after 2 days of not being able to eat anything!

via

So since my mind is a little all over, so will the content of this post! You may remember me mentioning the book The Circle Maker. Well one of my faves, Lysa TerKeurst, interviewed the author on her website. I had to share the links, there are just 3 short videos about 6 minutes each. I highly suggest taking 20 minutes to watch!
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3

As you may have guessed I spent the majority of my weekend in bed or on the couch. Friday I had a very unfortunate experience where our bedroom clicker would not work and the TV was stuck on the Disney channel. At first I felt punished because who wants to watch Wizards of Waverly Place when you have the flu but then I realized God was probably telling me to go to sleep. So I commenced to sleep the rest of the day and when I woke up around 9 p.m....the clicker worked again :)

In other completely non-related news I am up for a phone upgrade. Which is probably a good thing since I currently fear for my life whenever I text because my phone gets very hot and I worry it may blow up in my hands and then what would I do?? So now I must decide whether or not to join the rest of the developed world and get a smart phone, or stick with a boring, basic(less expensive) phone. Droid or IPhone? I know, I know, such a serious first-world decision.

Finally to end this very random post I have to say I have the SAG Awards on TV as I type and can Emma Stone do no wrong?? I just love her and her fashion choices!

via

As I proof read this post I realize how very random and jumbled it is, haha. So sorry....I'm just going to blame it on the fact that in this weekend I probably had more sleep in one time period than I have since Carsten was born. My brain doesn't know how to handle that much sleep anymore! 

So on that note....goodnight :)

Catchin' Up

Well it has been over a week since my last post..oops! That's not quite the consistency I was going for, but lately that beats my consistency in my workouts so I'll take it :).......now let me take a moment to set my alarm for my workout tomorrow morning...

Okay :) At the recommendation of my minister(and friend!) Chris, I am reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning. So far, soo good. Do you struggle with the concept of grace? Is it hard to apply it to your every day life, and learn to let go of your past mistakes and live in the present? Well, then like me this book is for you, dear friend.

There have been soo many good passages in the book so far. It's great because I checked it out from the library and obviously someone who had it before me thought so too because they took the liberty to underline, mark, and star all over - I love a book that has been well loved :) I have to share one of my fave passages just in case it touches anyone else like it has me...

"In conversation, the disciple who is truly poor in spirit always leaves the other person with the feeling, "My life has been enriched by talking with you." This is neither false modesty nor phony humility. His or her life has been enriched and graced. He is not all exhaust and no intake. She does not impose herself on others. He listens well because he knows he has so much to learn from others. Her spiritual poverty enables her to enter the world of the other when she cannot identify with that world...
The poor man and woman of the gospel have made peace with their flawed existence. They are aware of their lack of wholeness, their brokeness, the simple fact that they don't have it all together. While they do not excuse their sin, they are humbly aware that sin is precisely what has caused them to throw themselves at the mercy of the Father. They do not pretend to be anything but what they are: sinners saved by grace."

I truly hope and pray I can be anything close to that kind of disciple in my interactions with others!

My sweet friend Alicia recently had to move to Mississippi for over a year while her hubby completes training for the Air Force. Alicia has been such an inspiration to me since we met! We decided we would be accountability partners for memorizing 2 verses a month. I haven't memorized scripture since I was a kid. There is a reason it says in the Bible to learn the verses and hide it in your heart.....because it helps. So grateful to be doing this with a friend!
Now I better get to sleep before that alarm for my workout comes way too soon :)

Oh How He Loves Us

I have sat down to write a post a few times in the past week, but just wasn't feeling it and I told myself I wouldn't just write to post for posting's sake. It doesn't mean I didn't have things flowing through my head and heart because I do, but I think I know now why God wasn't allowing them to flow into words on this blog.

Have you ever had instances in your life where the same things keep popping up and you finally realize God is trying to make a point? I have had this a few times, and I've definitely been experiencing it in the past week. I've come to believe there are no such thing as coincidences, but instead as I heard my Mom call them this week "God-incidences". I like that term much better :)

If you've been reading along you know I am working on my prayer life. I am reading The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson. It is all about praying bold prayers. Also this week while reading the Bible I read about Elijah. He's a cool dude. Go read about him in 1 Kings. He happens to be a pretty awesome pray-er. (Just made that word up I think - but it works). This week in small group we talked about Jonah. He knows God wants him to do something but he runs away, and ends up in a situation(and a huge fish) where he is praying a heartfelt prayer knowing he has messed it up, but wanting more than anything to get the chance to do it right. Finally in multiple places this week I have been confronted with the verse Exodus 14:14 "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still".

So all of what I'm reading, all of what God has put in my path this week has led me to know he wants me to be still, pray diligently, keep studying his Word, and rely on him. He is teaching me right now. Preparing me. I may not know what all for, or I may have an idea but not see the full picture yet. But I know he wants the best for me just like any loving Father wants for his child. He wants more for each and every one of us. It's exciting!

A friend of mine shared this video on facebook today. I love this song, and this video is too powerful not to share. I hope you take the time to watch....

Have a wonderful weekend....I am looking forward to a snowy evening spent inside with the fire burning and breakfast for supper with my sweet boys. Perfection :)

A Chat with the Big Guy

Yesterday while Mr. C was at preschool and the baby took a long morning nap I did something I rarely get to do. I just laid in bed. Usually when this happens I try to take advantage of that time and clean house, exercise/shower without being interrupted(quite a feat when you have little ones), read a book...you get the idea. But for some reason yesterday I just felt like laying down.

I did get on the computer for a while - checked my email, got on facebook for a bit, and thought about writing a blog post. But nothing was coming to mind. So I put the laptop down. I just stared at the ceiling for a bit(thinking how weird it felt to be laying in my bed with sunlight shining through my window and the house being so quiet. Can you tell this doesn't happen much?).

And then I just started talking to God. Nothing serious. But I felt so relaxed, and it was just me and Him in the middle of my day. I'll be honest, usually he hears from me at the end of my day, when I'm tired and weary and more than likely in a hurry because sleep is calling my name. But yesterday I was reminded why I made prayer one of my resolutions. And I firmly believe that just taking those few moments of being quiet in his presence allowed some ideas for future posts to come to mind.

I need to pray more often throughout the day. Be in continual prayer, if you will. God is our Heavenly Father and if we truly love him and want him in our lives, we should obviously be talking to him, right?! I feel like we(and I'm including myself in that "we") often wonder at different times why God feels so far away, maybe not too real....just a looming figure in the skies. But I believe it is because we have distanced ourselves from him. He has never moved. Prayer is the medium by which we can talk with him, and the Bible being one of the ways he can talk to us if we take the time to read it, study it, and apply it to our lives. When we do these things we are drawing closer to Him.

Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.
Philippians 4:6-7 The Message

So I'm working on it! :) Do you have anything you would like prayer for? I know I have people in my life who pray for me and it is such a comfort, and it has always made a difference. I may not get the "answer" or outcome I want every time, but I know God hears those prayers from me and the ones made on my behalf....and he answers in his perfect will. So if you would like the comfort of knowing someone else is praying for you or along with you - let me know. I don't care if I see you every day in "real life", if we haven't talked in years, or if we have never met - Leave a comment or email me libbybolesky@gmail .com.

Friendship Bread Failure

I had never heard of friendship bread until recently. My sweet friend Amanda sent me a text and said she had three starters for friendship bread and would I like one? I replied with "Umm...what is friendship bread?? :)"  So after laughing at me she went on to explain that it is basically a bag of ingredients that are the start of homemade bread. You then do a little something to the bag for several days, be it just mashing up the mixture or adding a few ingredients, until it is time to bake! Sounds good(and fairly easy), right??

So I accepted this little bag of possibilities and set it on my kitchen counter. I took the recipe card that Amanda had hand-written the instructions on. For the first few days it wasn't much, just mashing up the mixture a bit. I was successful at my mashing on days one and two. But then I got busy....it was the week before Christmas and I was doing lots of baking in my kitchen.....and that poor little bag got pushed to the back of the counter and forgotten.....

Fast forward a few days. Nick is in the kitchen. He sees a bag of what appears to be....well..."mush" for lack of a better term and wonders what it is. So he opens the Ziploc bag and sticks his nose in it... Let's just say he got a rude surprise with the aroma that wafted out.....it wasn't very "friendly" :) And I was outed as a very bad person to give a friendship bread starter to. I haven't fessed up to Amanda yet(mostly because I haven't seen her since this happened!) I know she will laugh at me forgetting....in the long run ruined friendship bread isn't too big of a deal, but I really don't want to be a failure as a friend.

If you are like me then perhaps you can relate. You have the best intentions to call that friend that has been on your mind, check in with the one you haven't seen in a while, send a letter to one who has been going through a rough time. But it doesn't get done. You are busy doing life and at the end of the day when you are laying in bed you think "Oh....I will do that tomorrow!" But the next night you are thinking "Oops...definitely tomorrow". I am trying to be better at this. That means not waiting til I have perfect peace and quiet to pick up the phone, because really - when does a Mommy of 2 little boys ever have perfect peace and quiet??

I have found as a stay-at-home Mom that sometimes its easy to get lost in my own little world. It revolves around 2 sweet little boys and my husband, and right now I wouldn't change that for the world. But there are times when I have to remind myself life is continuing to go on outside my door and I need to continue to foster those relationships I have with my sweet girlfriends. Some of those friendships are over a decade old. The kind that you know will make it though thick and thin. You know too much about each other for them not be your friend, right?? :) (Just kidding. Sort of.) Some of those friendships are women I have met in the last few years and have come to treasure as a part of my life. I know God placed each woman in my path at the perfect time. I can learn from them, and I can give to them in some way if I take the time.

So my prayer is that each of my friendships with the special women in my life will grow deeper throughout this next year and beyond. I pray I take the time to make that happen. And I promise all my friends to give more effort to our friendships than I did to making friendship bread :)

Faith Like a Child

Sometimes its easier to get things done on our own. No distractions, nothing and no one to slow us down. For mommies with toddlers, one such thing is grocery shopping. You know what I'm saying if you've experienced this. Recently, I needed to run to the store for just a few items. My nearly 4 year old asked to go with me and at first I said no, he could stay home with Daddy and his little bro. I had waited til Daddy got home from work specifically so I would be able to go alone and get in and out quickly and easily. But C became upset when I said no. He really wanted to go with Mommy. And so a little begrudgingly I relented.

I must say in C's defense nearly 100% of the time he behaves very well. But every child has their moments. You know those young people with no children, or older parents whose children are far past this stage who look at the child throwing a tantrum in public with blame in their eyes? You can just hear their thoughts.... "Oh my child will never/never did act like that!". I have had a few instances where I want to respond to the young chick who hasn't been blessed with stretch marks yet, "Ohhh yes honey, oh yes your child will have a meltdown one day because you told him he could not get Spongebob fruit snacks because you have a box in the pantry already but he clearly thinks 2 boxes is better than 1".

But I digress :) I got Mr. C bundled in his coat and we got in the car. And before the Envoy had even left the garage I heard a sweet voice from the back say "Mommy, why did God make us?". And my heart was humbled. In my desire to hurry and get things done on my own, I could have missed out on the ability to answer a question that my little man had been wondering about, and waiting for a chance to ask his Mommy. So I answered his question as best as I could in nearly 4 year old language, and he seemed pleased. And I would like to say that he acted wonderfully at the store, I got everything I needed, and I enjoyed the one-on-one time with my first born that I have come to treasure since becoming a Mommy of two.

Will I never again go to the store alone? No, of course not. Sometimes I ask C if he would like to come with Mommy and he chooses to stay home and wrestle around and do boy stuff with Daddy, and that's perfectly ok. But I strive to always be open to discussion with my children. At his age, I am the adult C is with most often. I want him to be comfortable coming to me and Daddy with any question or concern. As he grows older and other people become more prominent in his life, I pray God will place spiritual leaders around him who will gave him sound guidance. Be it a teacher, coach, Sunday school teacher, and even his friends and peers throughout school.

When you become a parent you really do see everything through a child's eyes again. God, our Heavenly Father, could do absolutely anything he wanted on his own. But he allows us to be close to him, to know him, to be in a relationship with him. And aren't we "adults" often the ones throwing temper tantrums? We aren't getting what we want when we want it! We don't like being told no, even if our Father says its for our own good. We don't like the "rules" he gives us, even though we may actually thrive when we follow them. We think we can do things better on our own. Besides, we're adults! How dare we be treated like children.

He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them.
And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children,
you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 18:2-4 NIV